Teaching Children to Love:
Raising Balanced Children in an Unbalanced World

The Institute of Heartmath is “dedicated to helping people establish heart-based living and global coherence.” They have carefully researched the scientific basis to explain how and why the heart affects mental clarity, creativity, emotional balance and personal effectiveness. Early acquisition of healthy social and emotional skills profoundly affects performance in today’s classrooms. Relationship skills also affect success. There is enormous pressure in school to do well, fit in, and handle with aplomb relationships with family, friends and teachers. Heartmath stresses that even children can learn to handle stress, improve learning and strengthen relationships as they practice strategies for increased energy, mental clarity and emotional balance.

It is important to understand that the heart has an intelligence of its own. How many songs can you think of that tell about the condition of the heart. The heart is the seat of the emotion we know as love. Love balances children emotionally, physically and mentally. Harmonizing the heart and the brain through love is what establishes a complete intelligence; a complete self. The greatest gift we can give our children through life is love. Learning to love and developing the intelligence of the heart enhances all other aspects of intelligence for the good of the whole. Learning to appreciate the people, trials and tribulations of life transforms any problem into a learning experience. Learning how to set the brain and heart in sync leads to a quality of life known as resiliency.

Heartmath defines resiliency as “the ability to call upon inner resources and strength in order to bounce back from stress, risks and crises.” Resilient individuals manifest autonomy, resourcefulness, endurance and flexibility. It is always better to bend than to break! Learning to reduce anxiety over challenges within the school day and training children to problem solve are just two of the objectives in developing balanced children. Teaching children to love and respect themselves and others builds an ability to send care through a heart that is "opened".  

Building a parenting vision for developing a loving child means thinking forward. In order to have a balanced child who can successfully live in this unbalanced, self-centered world, a parent needs a plan that can be placed into action. Teaching Children to Love demonstrates techniques, such as a Heart Lock-in, where one learns to experience a genuine feeling of appreciation. We each have a choice about the kind of person we want to be. Doing one’s best means doing things wholeheartedly. Our strengths and talents flourish as a result. We also become our best self when we challenge ourselves to improve in areas where we need to grow. We begin by setting a goal and developing an action plan. Through small steps, practice and the support of others we can realize success. Cultivating the feeling of appreciation and care toward self and others develops “heart-smarts.” In this way a child becomes a resilient person, able to bounce back from difficulties and persist in reaching goals. Dr. William Glasser stated, “When children learn to express themselves thoughtfully and without fear, when they learn to listen and take an interest in others…they have developed a skill that probably correlates with success in life more than anything else taught in school.” Henry Ford, industrialist and inventor, stated, “Coming together is a beginning; keeping together is progress; working together is success.” Teaching Children to Love is a course that all parents should consider taking for the purpose of intentionally coming together, working together and keeping together with their child as that child is taught sensitivity and emotional coherence.

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